Avoiding the Toxic Relationship, Can You Recognize It?

Have you ever given every little thing to your lover? Is it even a good thing because they feel flattered after you giving or granting their needs? Have you gotten punished by your lover just because you did something wrong towards them? Or have you gotten the bad words by them?

A toxic relationship is one of the biggest problems nowadays. Some couples on earth, either a man or a woman, do not realize it. They might think it is a normal way to show affection to their beloved ones. It is not. The little thing you do can be categorized as toxic in a relationship. Almost everyone in this world has ever felt in love with someone. It is normal to have this feeling, liking and loving someone are the best feeling you have. It means that your feeling still alive. Everyone can feel the love, but not everyone can take the right action facing the bad ones. However, you need to know what actions can cause a toxic relationship. Before you know that, you need to recognize it first. How to recognize it?

Self-sacrifice is an action you do in a relationship. Have you done this kind of self-sacrifice to your lover? What did you do for them? Did it hurt you? When you are in a relationship, you will do everything, is it right? Some people do that and some people do not. Even in some songs tells about the self-sacrifice often. For example, “you know I’d do anything for ya.” -Grenade, Bruno Mars, “I’ll be saving my life for you.” -Best Mistake, Ariana Grande and “just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that’s alright because I like the way it hurts” -Love The Way You Lie, Rihanna. Those lyrics are representing how someone willing to hurt themselves for the sake of their lover.

Self-sacrifice is a normal thing to do as long as it never hurts you. When you cannot reject the thing that you do not want to or you do that with forcing yourself. A healthy relationship can be this toxic when you feel forced or hurt by doing that. The healthy relationship must be ‘give and give’. We are giving each other, not only her but also him. Therefore, you both will feel appreciated by your partner.

Next is ‘abusive’ relationship. This abusive relationship starts from the previous topic that we discuss, which is “Self-Sacrifice”. It starts when your partner always wanting you to grant all the things he wants, and when you granted it, he will probably continue this action repeatedly. Your partner will get angry easily, or he will force you to do what they want. If you do not want to give it, they will do bad things towards you. He can pinch, punch or even slap you without any mercy. Does it scare you? Now, do you find how simple it is? If you take the wrong action from the first, it brings you into the toxic relationship. However, if you recognize it, you need to stop this before the thing becomes worse and worst. Become the independent and distinctive is never wrong, because you need to protect yourself.

The last is sexual harassment. Maybe, some couples have ever been in this situation. Having an intimacy with your partner is never wrong. It is your choice to do that or not, but the problem is when you feel forced. It sounds insane but there are so many couples feel forced to do that. The partner is using you as a sexual object. Some of them even said if they got raped by their lover. This is so pathetic, because their love is not based on ‘pure-love’. Once they got trapped in this, they will be hard to get out from that circle. Before it is happened, you can avoid from your dating place. I mean, you can avoid to go to the place that can cause doing the sexual things.

Those are the three things to recognize the toxic relationships. The little thing can be categorized as toxic if you feel hurt by the action you did, do not always using the ‘self-sacrifice’ as your defenses to make it good. After that, you need to know about abusive action in relationship, you cannot be quite if your partner do violence towards you and you need to be more independent and distinctive to protect yourself. The last is sexual harassment, do not always force yourself to do what you do not want to. If they say something bad or even do bad things to you, you can end it directly. Once you trapped in this circle, you cannot get out from this easily, if you do not push yourself to be more defensive.